{"product_id":"bill-the-vampire-a-horror-comedy-audiobook","title":"Bill The Vampire - A Horror Comedy (Audiobook)","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem\u003eTHERE ARE REASONS WE FEAR THE NIGHT. HE'S NOT ONE OF THEM.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMy name’s Bill Ryder and I used to enjoy D\u0026amp;D, cold beer, and not getting my ass kicked by monsters. Sadly, that all came to an end the night I met Sally, a blonde bombshell with a sharp wit and even sharper teeth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eNow I'm a vampire, surrounded by undead pricks who are stronger, faster, and better looking than me. Worse, their leader, a douche-canoe called Night Razor, is looking for any excuse to put me out of his misery. There’s just one small catch. I'm a rare breed of vamp, one who’s immune to his control and not afraid to tell him where to shove it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eGood thing too because my roommates would rather set me on fire than help, while Sally's too busy exploiting me for personal gain. Talk about a freaking dumpster fire. I might be a bloodsucking predator of the night, but if I don't get my act together, I'll end up at the bottom of the food chain.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003ci\u003eBram Stoker\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cspan\u003e meets \u003c\/span\u003e\u003ci\u003eRevenge of the Nerds\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cspan\u003e in \u003c\/span\u003e\u003ci\u003eThe Tome of Bill\u003c\/i\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, the hilarious horror comedy series that will keep you laughing from dusk till dawn.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHere's what readers are saying:\u003cbr\u003e\"Crass, crude, and clever as all hell.\"\u003cbr\u003e\"I found myself laughing until my sides hurt.\"\u003cbr\u003e\"The perfect mix of nerd and urban fantasy.\"\u003cbr\u003e\"The humor stabbed me in the funny bone like a harpoon.\"\u003cbr\u003e\"The best part of Bill? He knows he's a nerd and is okay with it, but is still a smartass.\"\u003cbr\u003e\"This. Is. Hilarious!\"\u003cbr\u003e\"I've read all the books and can say that it's one of my favorite series.\u003cbr\u003e\"Fast-paced, action filled, fun, and sarcastic.\"\u003cbr\u003e\"Fun and moving, like a good cup of coffee.\"\u003cbr\u003e\"The whole series is full of action, laughs and great characters.\"\u003cbr\u003e\"Before I knew it I was finished and left wanting more.\" \u003cbr\u003e\"This book made me laugh and roll my eyes in the best of ways.\" \u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eGenres\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e: Urban Fantasy, Horror Comedy, Action \u0026amp; Adventure\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eContent Warning\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e: adult language, violence, gore, sexual situations, sophomoric humor.\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eNarrated by\u003c\/strong\u003e: Christopher John Fetherolf\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLength:\u003c\/strong\u003e ~7.5 hrs\u003cbr\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eFormat:\u003c\/strong\u003e DRM-free MP3 or Cloud Player\u003cbr\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/soundcloud.com\/rickg13\/bill-the-vampire-the-tome-of-bill-1?si=7936962d10c645eaa3775b6f467c32bb\u0026amp;utm_source=clipboard\u0026amp;utm_medium=text\u0026amp;utm_campaign=social_sharing\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Listen to a sample on Soundcloud\" rel=\"noopener\"\u003eListen to a sample on Soundcloud\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Horror Comedy Author Rick Gualtieri","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42012194078853,"sku":"Bill_1_Audio","price":4.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0589\/7918\/8869\/files\/bill_the_vampire_b32195b6-22b0-47be-9964-af3e7126270a.jpg?v=1792783366","url":"https:\/\/store.rickgualtieri.com\/products\/bill-the-vampire-a-horror-comedy-audiobook","provider":"Horror Comedy Author Rick Gualtieri","version":"1.0","type":"link"}